Please jingle for a friend

[khall]

A good friend and boarder/student of mine had a bad fall off her very large mare yesterday. She was unconscious when I got to her and took a few minutes to come around (some of the longest minutes in my life!). Stayed on the phone with 911 until first responders came, which thankfully by then she was coming around. She has a head injury even though she was wearing a helmet (just the way she fell, right temple got impacted hard, slight brain bleed and some minor pelvic fractures, nothing at this point requiring surgery. At least a 3 day stay in ICU. Mare spooked unexpectedly and took off at a canter with a few bucks thrown in. I'm not sure if my friend was bailing off or got thrown.

[StraightForward]

How scary! Many jingles for your friend.

[PaulaO]

Jingles for your friend.

[Sunshine2Me]

~~Jingles~~

[Kyra's Mom]

Healing jingles flying your friends' way.

Susan

[Canyon]

More jingles for your friend.

[VBOpie]

Yes, big jingles for your friend. Hoping for a quick recovery and no post trauma effects

[Hayburner]

Big jingles coming your friend/students way. Hopefully she'll be back in the saddle soon.

[Flight]

Jingles!!!

[piedmontfields]

Big jingles.

(btw, a head injury when wearing a helmet is not that unusual in a bad fall. But an injury is way better than death or LT disability. It usually would have been way worse without a helmet!!!)

[Tarlo Farm]

Oh man!! Hope she is ok!

[Chisamba]

Jingles

[StraightForward]

Any update on your friend?

[khall]

Thanks for asking about my friend SF and thanks for all the jingles, they are working! She is doing pretty good for as banged up she got. She is now in a regular room, they are getting her up and moving some with help of course. She is much better mentally, but cannot remember the accident at all. For the first couple of days her short term memory was very impacted, could not remember a conversation even minute to minute. I must of told her what happened countless times now, she was very confused. Now she can remember things that are going on from previous hours and even remembered from yesterday, thank goodness. That was very concerning! Still cannot remember the accident at all though, which is to be expected.

She has also I think come to the realization that this mare is just not the horse for her. Too green, too big and just not an easy ride for my friend. She admitted that to me today when I spoke to her. She has some great friends that are stepping in to help. It will be some time before she is back up to par, she is going to need time to heal that pelvis.

[chantal]

Glad she is feeling better, so scary!!

I hope her head injury isn't serious and that she heals quickly! Nice to hear she has good friends stepping in too.

What a scary thing for you to go through.

[piedmontfields]

So glad she is improving. Very scary and I hope she lets the mare go to a better match. Life is too short and delicate!

p.s. I had a fall with a head injury about 10 years ago. Cracked open my helmet. I still have no memory of the accident or of calling the barn owner after I woke up (I was alone). Presumably my horse tripped at canter in the fields, given the mud on both of our heads! Having no memory did make it easier to get back in the saddle, but I never rode that particular horse again.

[LeoApp]

Glad she is getting better each day. She should never ride that mare again. I doubt if, even when she is better physically, she will want to swing a leg over.

[khall]

Leo, yes I agree, not that the mare is a bad mare. This big spook was out of character for her and I am not really sure what she spooked at. They have been mismatched from the beginning, my friend is a re-rider getting back into it after 8 yrs off and went and bought a half broke big young TB/Perch who is a lovely mover but took a good bit of time and work to get her coming around. I had nothing to do with the purchase of the mare and tried to tactfully steer my friend away from her at the time to no avail. She got dazzled by the mare and did not recognize how green and needing of a good bit of foundation work the mare needed. We all know though that horse's spook, some just more than others!

[LeoApp]

Yes, I agree and I was not implying that the mare was bad. I just know about how an accident can make you never trust that particular horse again, but you are fine with other horses. Plus you say they are a bad fit, so that much more of a reason to sell her and get something that is a good fit for her.

[fergusnc]

Late in seeing this. So glad the jingles have been working! And so thankful folks are able to help her, and help with her mare. How terrifying for both of you.

[redsoxluvr]

Jingles for your friend!

[khall]

My friend is at home now and doing pretty good. Still has no recollection of the accident, so in talking with her yesterday again I went over what happened. I saw the entire incident, just have no idea what the spook was about. I also point blank said she has no business getting back on the mare. She pretty much knew that anyway and had made noises about selling her/finding her a new home even before the accident.

Question for you all about the mare. She is 16.1 and a big wide girl. Kind mare but the TB can come out in her sometimes. In other words while she does not usually spook, when she does it is forward and get out of there. She is also suspected of PSSM because of her breed and she has tied up before. On PSSM diet and has not had any issues in over a year now. Plus she had lameness issues from bad feet when she came here, has to wear a heart bar on RF. Nice mover but green at 8 yrs old. Good in hand work, knows SI, renvere, HI, HP in hand, not so much US because owner does not know much about lateral work. Hard to teach green horse green rider. 3 nice gaits, with especially good canter. Not a difficult horse but is requiring a more physical ride just because of big and green, but getting there! Any idea if she is even sellable?

[StraightForward]

I think she would be sellable, but at a fairly low price with the match being more important than the sales price. I'm reminded of the similar situation OneTrickPony got in, where a brave soul was thrilled to get the horse she needed to rehome. Can she jump? If you can get good video through a jumping chute, I'd market her to eventers. I think they would be more game for the challenge than many in the dressage crowd.

[Chisamba]

I was always taught, and followed, the get back on the horse that threw you theory of riding. For the confidence of the rider.

Interesting to see the opposite perspective.

[Chisamba]

Is she sound enough for the hunter pace, foxhunting crowd.

[khall]

Chisamba, IMO it is just not worth it with this horse/rider combo. Now granted the mare has not spooked this violently in the 2+ yrs she has had her with this rider, but the rider is just not strong enough or stable enough to handle such a spook again. With her injuries it will be awhile before she is even able to ride, so why keep the horse paying bills on her when she wants to sell her anyway.

The mare is sound now after having her feet put in good order by our vet and farrier. She had way too small a shoe on and was out of balance. She has high foot/low foot issue that had to be addressed and neg palmer angle both front feet, worse on the right which is why she wears a heart bar on that foot. She is a heavy mare, put on 200 lbs since she has been here, with big platter feet. I don't see her being a fox hunter. I would not want to take her out! She has a good bit of the TB personality in her. She has not been jumped or free jumped since being here. Not the bravest horse out there so not sure how she would be as an eventer. Again, I would not want to be the one taking her out on a cross country course! Though she may surprise me. She has been a funny one to deal with, took her awhile to not get buzzy when anything new happened around here. While mine are for the most part pretty settled when others haul in (like when I host clinics) this mare gets her blood up and can be quite spectacular about it with the charging around.

[kande50]

Chisamba, IMO it is just not worth it with this horse/rider combo.

The only decent riders I know who have rehomed a horse after one accident were those who were thinking about moving the horse along anyway, because they already knew the horse was too much for them, but were still holding out faint hope that he might come around.

The only other ones I know of who gave up on a particular horse after one unplanned event were relative novices who were suffering under the delusion that riding horses was a lot easier than it is.

[StraightForward]

The only other ones I know of who gave up on a particular horse after one unplanned event were relative novices who were suffering under the delusion that riding horses was a lot easier than it is.

Wow, that is mean. I am in this situation; newly backed horse threw me with no prior indication that she would be difficult to start. Brought in colt starter, he got her going, then his poor judgement on a particular day resulted in a wreck. Horse is now psychologically damaged, and I've spent a bit of the day talking with pro trainers who may be interested in taking on a project. I think it's just smart on my part, despite having started and brought along several horses in the past. Other than the experience level, there are things to take into consideration such as a pro having ground help, a safer, more standard arena than where I board, and potentially some velcro butt working students. Not wanting to deal with violent reactions doesn't make you a delusional novice. I was literally just crying over this situation with the nicest horse I've ever owned, then come here and read this.

I agree with khall's friend not swinging a leg over this mare again.

[khall]

kande, it only takes one time to end up dead. Mark's death hit home there.

This horse and rider combo were not well matched from the beginning, if you read my earlier remarks. She knew that fairly quickly, she was afraid of the horse initially (not while trying her out but once the mare got here, different horse who had obviously not had much exposure and not a good foundation for riding both biomechanically, very crooked, and mentally, a squirrel). Not to mention she spent several months not useable recovering from her feet issues. Then I basically had to work the horse for the rider (and I don't do full time training, not my deal here) for several months with lots of lessons to get them on a better track. They got better together, but still such a mismatch, rider has made noise off and on about finding her a new home.

I NEVER condem a rider for a) not wanting to get on a horse, scared b) wanting to sell a horse because of not working for said rider. We ride for fun and to develop what we can when we can. I have been in her shoes of trying to decide if my gelding Rip was one I wanted to keep (I had some fear issues because he was a spook/spinner and had come off a couple of times. Hard to stay on his 180s) but I have many years of riding behind me both starting young horses, riding a wide variety of horses and I decided to keep him and put my big girl panties on. Rip is not a horse for the average rider:) I am glad I did, even with the heart break I am facing now with him. I am 10 yrs younger with many more miles and experience under my seat though than this rider.

SF I don't blame you for wanting to send Pickles on down the road. I have done the same exact thing with a young horse I bred and raised. She was much more challenging than I wanted to deal with so gave her to a pro who loved challenging horses (he always loved Rip!). I have no regrets. She was registered GOV premium filly and just beautiful, but made Rip look easy.

[Chisamba]

By the way, when i say it is interesting seeing the different perspective, it was not meant as a criticism, it is genuinely interesting to evaluate a perspective thoughtfully that is different from the one quite thoroughly entrenched over the years by trainers etc. I had not intention of being mean.

I do happen to agree that some horses and riders are just not a match. that would not stop me from working the horse and leading her rider around on her in safe circumstances in the belief that it was essential to restore confidence. I do not know if it is essential to restore confidence that way, it is the way i was taught.

I think when a horse and rider do not suit, finding a more suitable situation is the best solution for both. I have several time assisted people to find alternative rides when a horse they bought turned out to be less suited than they thought.

[khall]

Chisamba the rider is still recovering, using a walker because of her pelvic cracks so no idea when she will even be able to throw a leg over a horse. Meanwhile she has found a rider who is willing to take a look at the mare to see if she would be suitable for the woman to ride and hopefully sell for the owner. Again, selling horses is not my deal and I have too much on my plate right now to even consider it. I do have a barn helper who is interested but that would mean the mare would have to stay here and I really don't want to go down that road. Having someone else work and sell horses off my farm.

I understand where you are coming from though because that is me too. I get back on pretty much regardless! With some of the riders I teach though it is not really in their best interest to do so. I know of quite a few who have fear issues or lack of strength/ability issues that they require such a specific horse. I just wished she had taken me with her to see this mare, but she felt confident in her own judgement. This is twice she has ended up with horses so not suited to her. That is my niche, to match horse and rider together. Knowing what the rider's need in order to feel safe and have a rideable horse. I've done it several times over the years for friends/students.

[StraightForward]

Chisamba, I did not think your post was mean. I do believe it depends on the circumstances. I did get back on Pickle a couple times after being thrown, but only being led at a walk. I know I stand a snowball's chance if she decides to unleash with her gift for bucking. The trainers who have seen her do it all mentioned that she'd be worth a lot as bucking stock, and they weren't kidding about that.

[kande50]

Wow, that is mean.

It's only mean if you choose to take it that way. Otherwise, it's simply an observation.

I agree with khall's friend not swinging a leg over this mare again.

I do too, because this sounded like a situation in which the rider already knew that she was tempting fate by continuing to ride this horse, and this event just made it clear to her that she really was.

Which is not uncommon, because I think most riders hold out hope that they'll luck out and be able to continue with a horse that is probably too much for them, because it's a challenge they'd like to be able to meet.

Not wanting to deal with violent reactions doesn't make you a delusional novice. I was literally just crying over this situation with the nicest horse I've ever owned, then come here and read this.

But this wasn't just one event and then you gave up. This was a series of events that made it clear that it wouldn't be a good idea for you to continue to try to ride this horse. And yes, some of the nicest horses, talent-wise, are the most difficult, because they're athletic and high-strung and we don't always have access to the resources we'd need to be able to stick with them.

[kande50]

kande, it only takes one time to end up dead. Mark's death hit home there.

The risk is always there, and in Mark's case it was probably higher because he was willing to get on horses that he didn't know well.

They got better together, but still such a mismatch, rider has made noise off and on about finding her a new home.

A friend of mine had the same experience. Bought the horse of her dreams when she was in her late 40's. The horse was athletic, but nervous and reactive. She got help and got the horse going and was riding her, horse spooked, she came off and broke her back. Fortunately, she healed up okay and is now riding again, but at that point she knew for sure that the horse wasn't ever going to work out for her.

If we were sensible enough we'd evaluate the frequency and nature of our close calls and near misses and make our decisions based on that instead of waiting to have a wreck, but I think that ability is something that develops over time (and maybe wrecks).

I also find it odd when owners won't ride their own horses because they've had some bad experiences with them, but will get on horses they don't know much of anything about. That just seems so foolish to me, as I'm just the opposite: better the devil I know than the devil I don't.

I am glad I did, even with the heart break I am facing now with him. I am 10 yrs younger with many more miles and experience under my seat though than this rider.

Oh, I get the age thing. It's not that we're unable to sit on a horse anymore just because we're older, but the drama that used to motivate and invigorate has now become unpleasant enough that we're much more motivated to avoid it.