Lonely cat

Tabby
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Lonely cat

Postby Tabby » Fri May 05, 2017 10:45 pm

Some of you may remember my posts on my old cat with the dietary issues that eventually developed cancer and was PTS this past winter. I still have his sister and I think she may be suffering loneliness. We try to give her as much attention as we can, but we still both work full time and aren't here much. She meows an awful lot when we come home and even if we leave the room and then return. Even just going to the bathroom!!! I'm also concerned because we have a 2 week vacation planned in September - I don't think she can stand to be alone that long with just someone to come in once a day to feed her.

I'm thinking of possibly getting another cat and maybe that's where people here can advise me. She hasn't been exposed to other cats since she was very young (she's 13 now). When her brother was alive, if another cat came to the window, he'd get all in a tizzy and they'd end up fighting each other. I don't know how much she contributed to this - I always blamed him but she might not be so innocent. I have a feeling she'd accept a kitten better than an adult cat - and a kitten would more likely interact with her. With another adult cat, they may not like each other and merely just tolerate each other. On the other hand, she's an overweight, elderly arthritic cat - would a kitten's antics torture her?

Wise DDBB - what say you?

Edited to add - I don't even know how much longer this cat will live. She's 13 and I always thought her brother seemed healthier, even though he had a few issues. She's been overweight her whole life and arthritic for years. I've found a glucosamine supplement that seems to help but it's not a cure. Do I want to get a young kitten to bond with a cat that won't even be here long and end up with another lonely cat?

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Saddlebum
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Re: Lonely cat

Postby Saddlebum » Sat May 06, 2017 1:24 am

Because of her health issues and age, I would advise getting two kittens. They would play with one another more than her -- but, give her lots of company. Because of her age, weight, and health issues, this would be welcome as the kittens would entertain her, give her company and maybe entice her into a bit of exercise.

Kittens need another kitten to play with. They teach each other how it hurts to play too hard, empathy, and just the amount of energy they have - it's best if you get two. At least from my experience.

She, on the other hand, has a lot to teach them how to behave and bring them into adulthood. I would definitely advise getting two at the same time.

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Chisamba
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Re: Lonely cat

Postby Chisamba » Sat May 06, 2017 1:59 am

Saddlebums advice seems clever to me.

texsuze
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Re: Lonely cat

Postby texsuze » Sat May 06, 2017 4:05 pm

And a third enabler here, for two kittens! Please post pics once you get them home from the animal shelter :) And we can help you with names ;)

VBOpie
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Re: Lonely cat

Postby VBOpie » Sat May 06, 2017 4:12 pm

Yes, I agree with Saddle bum's advice - hadn't thought of that approach. Pictures please!

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby amygdala » Sat May 06, 2017 5:19 pm

i had 2 cats. when 1 died, the remaining cat became (i thought) very clingy & needy. so i got him a kitten, he was horrified! appalled!
he wasn't telling me he was lonely, he was telling me how happy he was to be the only cat :lol:
it took him quite a while to adjust to having a buddy....

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby Dapple Field » Sat May 06, 2017 7:25 pm

Following this with interest!! We have a 16 year old male Himalayan who just lost his sister. Some of his yowls sound as if he is in pain but if we talk to him or pick him up he stops. He's been to the vet and seems OK but we have to go away on 2 separate occasions and will leave him at home where it's familiar to him, with someone coming in 2 or 3 times a day to check in on him. He loves to go to bed with us though and I worry about him at night. We do have a cat who comes in and out but they have no interest in each other so I don't think another cat is going to help. We did take him on a 3 week trip to Aiken, SC last winter and he seemed to enjoy himself but we drove. We're flying on the next trip to multiple places so can't bring him this time. It's so hard to leave the old ones alone. He does have an amazon parrot housemate but the two don't interact.

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby Amado » Sat May 06, 2017 11:20 pm

I dunno - cats can be wierd - and sometimes adding another one or two causes some pretty serious behavioral issues - like spraying. We've had many cats. The only time I've had issues with cats spraying is when we've had more than one at the same time. I had a male that sprayed, and my current female sprays when she's really upset (and the other cat is her male sibling). So I would be really careful about getting more cats.

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby Tabby » Sun May 07, 2017 12:45 pm

Hmmm - two kitties..... I wonder how I can convince DH of this? It does make a lot of sense!

I worry about going away because I had this situation with my previous pair of cats. The male died leaving the female alone. These 2 never seemed to really care about each other - they coexisted and didn't fight but didn't really interact together. The female seemed more than content to be an only cat - until we went away for a week. According to the neighbour that looked after her, she was extremely distraught the whole time. They even tried to spend a few hours each night watching our tv so she wouldn't be alone, but she was a wreck. After that, we decided to take her with us anytime we went away. But we were younger then and only took road trips to visit family - and we also brought the dog so bringing a cat wasn't an issue. That cat had already traveled a lot since she moved with us to the US and back. My current cat goes into full panic mode just going 2 blocks to the vet. I don't think she'd handle a full on road trip. The trip we're planning for September is a cruise and I'm pretty sure they won't let kitty aboard.

As for introducing cats - would the same techniques apply bringing in 2 kittens as one (i.e. separating them with a door etc.)?

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby Josette » Sun May 07, 2017 2:44 pm

Tabby wrote:Edited to add - I don't even know how much longer this cat will live. She's 13 and I always thought her brother seemed healthier, even though he had a few issues. She's been overweight her whole life and arthritic for years. I've found a glucosamine supplement that seems to help but it's not a cure. Do I want to get a young kitten to bond with a cat that won't even be here long and end up with another lonely cat?


I think this is the critical question you asked. This was/is my situation. At one time, I had 3 cats of various ages. First I lost the elderly female who did not bother with the other 2 males - preferred only DH. Then I lost the older male my soul kitty - the 2 males were years apart in age but would groom each other. Short time later I found a rescue kitten (female) and brought her into our home. My adult male tolerated her but they ignored each other. I lost him 2 years ago and now am left with the 4 year old female cat who plays with my small chihuahua mix dog age 5 (who does not like other dogs). The household has settled into this routine and everyone seems content with the current arrangement. We have a short trip planned and I have a pet sitter to visit several times daily to walk dog and feed. I could board them but this arrangement seems far less stressful IMO. I am with them all the time so I cannot make myself feel so guilty if I need a short break. :roll:

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby fergusnc » Mon May 08, 2017 12:46 pm

Venturing outside the box here, but have you considered a dog? My first dog liked other dogs, in their place, and other than her puppyhood roommate (college days, my roomie's dog), she was not interested in sharing her domain. When I graduated, not liking the idea of her alone all work day, I got an adult cat from the pound. They were awesome buddies. Would you cat like a mellow dog?

Further down that road, I got the pound cat a 6 month old, pound kitten. The kitten had to be kept separate for a few weeks due to an upper respiratory infection. When they were allowed together the kitten acted like the cat was the new addition and was a complete handful. Pound cat was so mellow it extinguished quickly. Years later, I brought home a stray kitten about 5 months old. The original pound kitten, now several years old, wanted to eat her. They actually stayed at odds...all the original pound kitten's doing...until literally the day I put my original pound cat to sleep. Before we left for the vet I found her negotiating a truce between them...I know she knew she was leaving us. When I got home from the vet, alone, I found the two remaining cats curled up together in my bed....first time in years they ever shared a pi EC of furniture, let alone touched each other. Bond lasted til death.
Another time, a stray dog i took in, that college dog actually wanted as a side kick, found a teeny kitten while on a walk. He insisted I rescue him and I carried him the one mile home. The original pound kitten, now grown, wanted to eat him and I had to keep him separate til I got him into a foster home. The other two cats adored him. Final cat addition was a grown male stray, not yet neutered, and original pound kitten was afraid of him. Took years for her to understand he just wanted to play, and they ended up all snugged together all the time.
But all cats loved all my dogs over the years...way easier to get that bond going than the crap shoot that was the new cat intro.

But if you don't want dogs, out of 4 cats in my history, only one was tricky about being a friend to other cats.

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby highoctane » Tue May 09, 2017 3:46 pm

I have a similar situation with my 16-1/2yo kitty. I originally had 4 adopted cats...one by one they've crossed the Bridge until it was just Porscha when Geddy passed last year of heart failure. Since, it's been a daily struggle to get her to eat, even warranting a few emergency vet visits. Sometimes I think she'd like a companion...but she was never super close to any of the other 3. She has inflamed bowels, either due to IBD or lymphoma, and I don't want to cause her any undue stress that might make her condition worsen.

I default to keeping her single, as I'm afraid to upset her status quo at her age. I'm not sure it would be fair to her. :-/

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby LeoApp » Tue May 09, 2017 6:50 pm

I think it would be very stressful to introduce a strange animal to an elderly pet. Especially a cat. They are not pack animals. If they are raised together they are usually OK. Older cats sleep most of the day. I don't think they get that lonely. Do you have any friends that can stay in your house for the 2 weeks you will be away?

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Re: Lonely cat

Postby amygdala » Tue May 09, 2017 10:11 pm

i agree with LeoApp!


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