Should I mind my own business?

PaulaO
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Should I mind my own business?

Postby PaulaO » Mon Aug 20, 2018 4:10 pm

Friend P. has alerted me that former barnmate S. asked P. how I like it at my barn. S. is looking for a new barn. S. is kind of crazy. Even though she is retired, she only came to the barn at 7pm when nobody else was out. She didn't like other people at the barn at the same time. She wanted the place to herself. She didn't respect closing hours, and was a whiner and attention seeker. She currently has an OTTB and is overhorsed.

I have an excellent relationship with current BO and BM. Should I warn them that S. may be calling? She would not fit into my barn. The BM and BO have no tolerance for foolishness and would have no problem telling S. to behave.

My gut says mind your own business. I think y'all would agree with me. I don't want to look like "that boarder" to BO and BM.

piedmontfields
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby piedmontfields » Mon Aug 20, 2018 4:14 pm

If you are asked for your opinion by your current BO/BM, you may give it. Otherwise, MYOB.

Hayburner
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby Hayburner » Mon Aug 20, 2018 4:38 pm

I agree with piedmontfields - I do understand how you feel like you should say something especially if this person drops your name as a "reference".....

I have 2 friends that I would not give a great recommendation to a barn owner. I love them dearly but they are never happy and are insistent that things should be done their way! They also move from barn to barn hoping to find the perfect facility rather than change some of their petty ways....LOL....

Moutaineer
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby Moutaineer » Mon Aug 20, 2018 5:21 pm

I think S is on my barn poisoning the atmosphere at the moment... please take her!

AmityBee
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby AmityBee » Mon Aug 20, 2018 7:11 pm

PaulaO wrote:...she only came to the barn at 7pm when nobody else was out.



What piedmontfields said!

BUT, nobody else out at the barn at 7pm?! What wonderland is this? We have basically rush hour from 2-8pm and even people out as early as 5.30am and as late as 9.30pm (closing time). About 50 boarders and not a lesson barn OR show barn. :D

PaulaO
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby PaulaO » Mon Aug 20, 2018 7:32 pm

The previous barn was small, about 27 horses, and more than half the horses were retired. About a quarter of the remaining had absent owners, which left about 8 people who rode and nobody was a serious rider....

I will MYOB. It really is none of my bizniz.

WheresMyWhite
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby WheresMyWhite » Tue Aug 21, 2018 3:24 pm

I'm with the rest. MYOB unless the BO asks for your opinion/feedback.

For all you know, maybe S has changed (highly unlikely :) ).

Spreading rumor and innuendo proactively can make you look, IMO, petty.

Wait until asked and then have your say :)

Sounds like it would be a good thing if you're never asked because she did't come calling at your current bard :D

PaulaO
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Re: Should I mind my own business?

Postby PaulaO » Wed Aug 22, 2018 3:56 pm

WheresMyWhite wrote:
Spreading rumor and innuendo proactively can make you look, IMO, petty.


Thank you. That's exactly what I needed to hear.


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