(swim, not riding) Lesson etiquette advice?

[Moonshine]

This could just as well be a riding lesson advice question:

My eight year-old has been taking swim lessons on and off from the same person for 2+ years. We like her. Except: my daughter has been struggling with butterfly stroke, and even though I have mentioned several times that this was our current big goal, the teacher mostly works her through distance sets instead of actually getting in the pool with her and teaching her the mechanics of the stroke.

So yesterday the teacher couldn't make it, so we had a substitute. He got in the pool with her and did some explanations of mechanics, and lo and behold, after 20 minutes my kid is flying down the pool!

I assume that since I'm the one paying 20 bucks for a 30 minute lesson, there's nothing wrong with me asking this guy to continue with her, at least until she gets butterfly down? Of course, I'll tell her other teacher what's up ("kid somehow gets butterfly with coach x, but we'll be in touch soon about resuming our regular Sunday lessons with you," or something like that...)

Just making sure I'm not botching anything!

[Paints]

Do you want to switch instructors permanently? I think this is what you need to be prepared for because you have no way of predicting how the current instructor might respond.

I think we have all had that experience of going to a clinic and having a breakthrough. Sometimes just a different explanation or a fresh voice in our ear makes a world of difference. But - you have to determine if the clinician or in this case substitute instructor would be overall a better option for your daughter in the long run.

If you have a good relationship with the current instructor, could you discuss your frustrations of her not teaching the breaststroke to your dd even though you had mentioned it? You thought you were communicating a big goal and she may have heard a wish. It can be really tough to jam those kinds of conversations in at lesson time. Perhaps it would be good, whatever instructor you continue with to have a quick followup every so many weeks to determine the plan for your daughter so that you can be sure you are on the same page. There may have been a good reason why the instructor was delaying teaching dd the breaststroke, but failed to communicate that to you.

When I evented I had a coach who made jumping far too complicated for me. I didn't realized that was the problem until she took a break after the birth of her child and her husband taught me. He was more of a hunter/jumper person and made jumping so much more straightforward. I really started to enjoy it more and improved. When she returned to teaching I was up front with her. I took dressage and xc from her and stadium from her husband. I think we were all happier LOL.

[Tarlo Farm]

I would do exactly as you said Moonshine. No drama, just another voice in the mix.

[chantal]

We are dealing with a similar issue with a fencing coach, though DS is 16 and is the one who wants to continue with him.

You are the client, it's a business relationship. It gets blurred/personal because of all the time you spend with this personal, but in reality it's a business relationship. Do what's best for your daughter.

(mom of 3 swimmers)

[Maple]

I think you should proceed just as you said, Moonshine. Keep it friendly but make it clear the course you wish to take: have Coach 2 teach butterfly (tough stroke to learn!) and reassure Coach 1 that you'll be back once DD's 'fly is solidified (if that's what you ultimately decide). Like chantal said, it IS a business relationship and you need to do what's best for YOU.

I have noticed over the years that some coaches, and even some entire clubs, have one stroke they excel in and the others are just meh (probably due to their coach's particular expertise in teaching that stroke). Swimmers will usually have one or two strokes they are best in, too...you will eventually see what that is for your daughter.

(mom of 1 swimmer, who is a freestyle/backstroke sprinter)

[Moonshine]

Oh, yeah, Maple, re: finding one's best stroke - my kid's favorite is definitely breast stroke. It's faster than her freestyle!

Thanks, everyone; you're right: it boils down to a business/service thing. And for more context, these teachers are all college students who are just doing this as supplementary income. And for more context, the primary instructor in fact "fired" us for a semester while she focused on her studies for a semester, and we understood completely. That's when we first were introduced to the new butterfly teacher.

And I have found that the less drama and list of explanations I offer, the better things seem. Simply "We're going to work with Mike for a month while we get butterfly down, and then we'll be looking forward to jumping back to you, if you have time."

Nice hearing from some other swim moms, btw! I'm actually taking a lesson on Friday to finesse my own butterfly, and yes, it *it* a hard stroke, but I think it's my favorite!