Facing Change:

[Chisamba]

Do you think fear of change prevents us from taking positive steps forward? I tend to try to manage the status quo. I know some people who move around a lot, so I know this is not true of everyone, but at times, looking back, I think i should have made the move to change before I did.

I am currently stressing about making a change that I think is necessary. I feel very anxious about it.

how do you deal with change?

[Flight]

I'm not a fan of change either, however I usually know that if something does change it either has to happen, or I have no choice so I just get through it and accept the anxiety. If that makes sense.

[KathyK]

I am much better at reacting to and adjusting to changes than I am at deciding to make them. I don't know whether it's fear of change, or fear of making a mistake. Getting good input and counsel from people you trust helps. If a change is necessary, then it's necessary. You can anticipate the fallout, good or bad, and be prepared for it.

[PaulaO]

I only like change when I decide to it, or when it benefits me. I started working at a community hospital 15 years ago. Sixyears we "merged" (i.e., were taken over) by a larger hospital and everything changed--personnel, procedures, the flooring. We had no input. I hated it and them. Two years ago we were absorbed by a huge health system and guess what. I don't care. I don't car what color the floor is or who runs HR. I'm over it.

My divorce was not my idea, but I looked forward to moving into my own place. So even when change is scary, I look forward to it as a challenge.

[silk]

Change is hard.... change is scary.

One has to have the ability to weigh up the pros and cons and put emotional ties aside (to some extent at least).

I am about to embark on the scariest move of my life - a new job in a new city. I'm leaving home, been here (on the home farm) nearly 20 years [ and lived with my family/mum my whole life!!!). I'm leaving my horses (at least temporarily) at home. I'm moving in with other people. Quite honestly, it scares the shit out of me. But I'm doing it...

I had to weigh up the job, the career benefits, the salary, the cost of living increases, the stress, the fact that I'm totally underutilised in my current role and the progression within my current company is not likely to be as quick or as good or as much... Overall, the new opportunity came out on top, even though it's the scariest thing I've ever done, and it feels like the 'right' decision.

[Racetrackreject]

I used to think that change was awful and I avoided it at all costs and had minor/major meltdowns when it was forced upon me. Then, years back, I realized that change is pretty cool. It's an opportunity to reinvent yourself in some ways or simply start over. That isnt' to say that I'm any less wary of it, or that it still doesn't take me too long to see that I need to make it happen, but when I do, I'm all in and excited and looking forward to see how things turn out.

I'm about to make a huge life change and it's scary and is going to cause a lot of hurt along the way, but I'm at the point where I know it needs to happen and that I'll be better for it spiritually and mentally, in the long run. I know people will think I'm doing it for another reason, a temporary one, and that's fine. I don't really care what people think anymore. I'm happy and I feel better just knowing that I've made the decision to make this change.

[LeoApp]

I agree that I prefer change when I am the one that initiates it, but even then there is the fear of the unknown, and the fear that you may have made the wrong decision. However, nothing ventured nothing gained. I feel that nothing is permanent if you don't want it to be, and if you made a wrong turn and you need to change again, so be it. I think it helps you grow as a person.

[Chisamba]

I made a list of pro and con. I tried to consider every aspect, even hugely unlikely outcomes. I ranked my list in groups of highly likely and unlikely.

Then I went with my instinct/ gut feeling. I waited a few weeks to make sure I still felt it was important, and then I initiated. I admit therevwas a final straw that kicked me into gear.

It will take a month before all is settled and then I will have to develop my new routine. It will be good, it will just take calm consideration and flexibility.

[exvet]

Sounds very rational and reasonable. I have, as others, had to react and respond to change and while I may not have always welcomed it, I've always tried to make the best of it. In terms of making the decision to change, yes, it's scary but in all honesty I don't worry about making a mistake. I've come to points along the line where I felt a change was needed and decided to just dive in, something totally different, not having any idea what the outcome would be but at least it would be an opportunity to make a difference. I feel that as long as I"m making a rational decision after weighing all the options then right or wrong, at least I made the leap and didn't stay stagnant just for the sake of fear of the unknown. I had a colleague many years ago tell me to face my fears otherwise my fears would still happen.................I actually try to do that and am thankful I did and do.

[boots-aregard]

I think this is one of the factors on the dimension chart. Some people instinctively embrace change, others CAUSE change, others fight change and still others simply cannot change.

I'm one of those rational type people. I read you saying you went with your instinct/gut feeling, and shudder. Because I don't have any good strong instinct/gut feeling. So, I look for the reasons, make my decision, and then forcefit the sometimes messy result into the clearly delineated boxes I THOUGH were there (but in reality usually aren't).

If I had to rely on my gut, I'd be in a world of hurt. It's funny how we are all different.

[MaryC]

I like change! I've been working for young companies for years, and the pace of change from startup to mature is huge. Fortunately, much of the real change is in the areas I manage, and I'm the one making them, whether personally or at work. I'm the problem-solver, and problems usually result in some change somewhere. I'm also a bit of a planning control freak, so I've got all the scenarios played out in advance. I make (what I hope is a) well-thought out decision, and move forward. Yes there's still sometimes a lot of stress, but it's recognized in advance.

[kande50]

I like change as long as it's not too much work and at least has the potential to make things better.

What I don't like is when I list all the pros and cons and then find that the reason I was having trouble making a decision in the first place was because there was no clear advantage or disadvantage to making the change.

[Ponichiwa]

Bumping this thread because a) it's near and dear to my heart right now, and b) I solemnly swear I will contribute more to this board.

My company (and industry) has been undergoing rolling layoffs over the last 2.5 years. This has effectively frozen my organization, as everyone is afraid to make a change as it may lead to getting laid off.

I need a change in my job/role/potentially company because I will otherwise go insane. I've been having to give myself pep-talks about advocating for myself and being proactive about job opportunities/promotions, and it's so far out of my comfort zone that by the time I get home I'm exhausted.

But I can say one thing for sure: It's a heck of a lot better to have change that you're affecting or driving rather than change that's imposed upon you by external forces.

[calvin]

Ponichiwa, those are words to live by. I think many of us wait too long to make change. Then we look back and say, I should have done that ages ago. I think a friend of mine summed it up well - by the time you are thinking it is time to make a change, you have subconsciously made the decision that change is in order. The next words to remember are, "there are always options". And, there are. Perhaps this reflects one of Newton's laws to the effect that an object at rest or in stasis tends to stay there, until an outside force is exerted. Better be the change agent yourself, than the person affected by someone else's decisions. Now, I say that as a self-employed person nearing the end of my career. Perhaps it it is completely different when one is an employee of a company. However, employees (perhaps especially in the US?) seem to have little say and few rights when "Management" makes restructuring decisions. I have been watching a number of people live through big life changes - employment, marital status, location, horse/horseless - and the big one, death of a loved one. The common denominator is finding joy in our days, and employment and our life situations. Our choice to be positive very much affects how we feel about life. We have to make these precious days count.

[Chisamba]

Find joy in the now! Thank you Calvin.